Wait, wait, wait – Stephenie Meyer’s husband’s name is Pancho? Ha. HA. That’s awesome.
We see that’s she’s opening this tome with some Robert Frost. Is nothing sacred??
The first sentence contains the word “subterfuge.” We’re quite certain that most of the people who are in love with these books will have noooo idea what the word means. (In this case, it seems to mean “deception,” “distraction,” or something similar, in case you were wondering, though it’s very out of place and unnecessary. Stop trying to show off with fancy vocab, SMeyer. We all know it’s just your thesaurus skillz shining through and not any actual intelligence or talent.)
In this glimpse of things to come, it seems that Bella is – once again – in danger. Edward seems to be defending her single-handedly from a group of black-eyed somethings-or-other who want to kill her. Surprise. SMeyer should stop starting out her books this way; we know we won’t be lucky enough for any of them to actually be killed off.
And then, “Somewhere, far, far away in the cold forest, a wolf howled.” (Is that like, in a galaxy far, far away?)
Ugh. Here we go.
P.S. – We are very upset to discover that this book is much longer than the first two… 27 chapters plus an epilogue. Fuck. Settle in, kiddies.Onward to Chapter 1!